If cricketers were students... :)

How to quit a job in style !

Innocence at its best !!

A little boy, after being shouted at by his mom (sitting sadly)
Dad asked : "What happened son?"
Kid :  "Dad, I can't handle your wife anymore! I want my own wife!"

Who's the Boss?

When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss. The brain said, "I should be Boss because I control the whole body's responses and functions."

The feet said, "We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go." The hands said, "We should be the Boss because we do all the work and earn all the money." And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally the asshole spoke up.

All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the Boss. So the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work. Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered. Eventually they all decided that the asshole should be the Boss, so the motion was passed.
All the other parts did all the work while the Boss just sat and passed out the shit!

Management Lesson: You don't need brains to be Boss, any asshole will do!

Kiran Bedi : A Top Cop with a difference

Kiran Bedi is a name which needs no introduction.She is India's First Lady IPS officer & was one of the top cop's with an excellent work background,

And here she is sharing her valuable thoughts & experience.

Classic Definitions with Cool Meanings

1. Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
2. Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
3. Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.
4. Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
5. Father : A banker provided by nature.
6. Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.
7. Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
8. Criminal : A guy no different from the rest... except that he got caught.
9. Love affairs : Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.
10. Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master.
11. Divorce : Future tense of marriage.
12. Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.
13. Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
14. Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.
15. Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

Does Management know their Staff ?

On walking into the factory, the Managing Director of the Company noticed a young guy ..... leaning against the wall and doing nothing.

He approached the young man and calmly said to him, "How much do you earn?"

The young man was quite amazed that he was asked such A personal question, he replied, none the less, "I earn $ 2000.00 a month, Sir. Why?"

Without answering, the MD took out his wallet and removed $6000.00 cash and gave it to the young man and said,

"Around here I pay people for working, not for standing around looking pretty!

Here is your 3 months salary, now GET OUT and don't come back".

The young man turned around and was quickly out of sight.

Noticing a few onlookers, the MD said in a very upset manner,

"And that applies to everybody in this company".

He approached one of the onlookers and asked him, "Who's the young man I just fired?"

To which an amazing reply came - "He was the pizza delivery guy , Sir!"